DAVE BARRY is roughly 400 years old and has lived in Miami most of that time. He has written more than 23 million columns and 11,000 books, the most recent of which is Class Clown: The Memoirs of a Professional Wiseass: How I Went 77 Years Without Growing Up, his first and – he hopes – last memoir. You would probably enjoy it. It’s much more accurate than this biography.